'𝘚𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨' Zip-up Hoodie

     Layered thermal knit zip-up hoodie with custom distressing throughout, printed patches & a thin outer layer with an additional hood (for when one hood just isn't enough). 

     Additional features include a chrome zipper, two front pockets & drawstrings encircling the hood(s). Very grunge, very dystopian. Ideal for solemnly standing in the rain, possibly brooding, but definitely looking sternly out over a lake of sorts while dense grey clouds swirl & spiral high above. "Theres a storm brewing" you say to yourself, before adding "and not just the one within my unpenetrable, opaque heart!" You're so mysterious.

    You reminisce about your long lost lover, their name forever on your lips, memories of them stain every thought you have and fill every breathe you take as if their very essence had been tattooed onto your soul. You whisper it now, Claudia, or maybe, Vergil (you pick), sending a quick shiver down your spine as you do. You'd met eachother years ago on a trolley car in Brussels. You were quietly reading the newspaper and upon turning the page, you'd heard a voice behind you politely exclaim "oh I wish you wouldn't! I hadn't finished the piece about Martha Stewart's prison romance yet" and things progressed swiftly after that. That was years ago and yet, to this day, even the mere mention of Martha Stewart sends you into a despondent state of heart-wrenching nostalgia from which reemergence is a long, difficult process. 

      Over the course of your firey romance, their love had thawed your icey heart and showed you a world of genuine compassion & joy. However, just as you were beginning to think maybe the universe isn't a cold, heartless void (much like yourself) they perished in a horrible boating accident, but not on a yacht or speedboat, it was one of those paddle boats you sometimes see in rom-coms that are shaped like giant swans which, given your unshakable affinity for cliches, it seems rather fitting your relationship would end in such a craft. Paddling in such a ridiculous receptacle usually wouldn't have constituted a safety hazard but of course most people don't wear boots inexplicably soaked in gasoline, especially not simply because they "like the smell" as you would later say according to the police, who'd been called after you had dropped a lit roach in the boat which immediately ignited the highly flammable fumes stemming from your boots & soon engulfed the entire vessel. The situation was so embarrassing that, once you were both safely rescued from the shallow pond on which this easily mitigated disaster had occurred, the person you had thought was your soulmate immediately broke things off, leaving you standing on the edge of a small, shallow pond, smelling like gasoline, weed and shame, handcuffed and weeping rather loudly. Thats what I meant by "perished" earlier, like they perished from your life... is that not how that word is used? Look, I'm not a linguist ok? Sorry.

     Anyway, now you spend your days staring vacantly across that same body of water, basking in the sorrow of your many regrets and we think you deserve to look your best while you do that! That's where this hoodie comes in. See you out there, lake buddy!

    Tax free. 1 of 1. Unisex. Fitted. 100% cotton.

Size: Large (but not a baggy large, more fitted than a traditional large)

 Measurements:
   • Length (down the center): 25.5"
   • Pit to pit: 24"